7.13.2009

It is Monday


Not Wednesday... but I thought it would be fun.

I found this blog, Momma Kat's Losing It, through Life {Sweet} Life. In one of my moments of blog hopping and thought it would be fun.

It has a Wednesday feature to inspire writing, and I thought I would jump in.

#5. What are you paranoid about?

I saw this question, and it really made me realize how paranoid I have been lately.

I am a worrier... I tend to think and rethink things over and over - trying to stack the odds for a happy outcome. The negative of all this planning is that I miss the happy moments that just happen. Over the last few years, I have been REALLY trying to let things go, let things happen and develop, be more spontaneous. It has worked. Not that I am at all a "free spirit" that I would lave to be, but I at least can be along for the ride with out a detailed map - on occasion.

Now, this pregnancy has made all my efforts just go up in smoke. I want to do it all so well, that it is consuming me. I want to be a great mom, have a great family, have a great pregnancy, have a great delivery - while being a great employee, a great wife, a great friend. You see I leave little room for mediocrity. I am paranoid about not doing well. I am paranoid on top of that about worrying too much. Ahhh.... back to worrying about worrying. What a useless time waster that is! So here I am, back to aiming for relaxation and taking 5 deep breaths... Okay, maybe 10.

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