8.16.2011

Nelly



I have a kinda friend...
we haven't known each other long 
but have met up a few times for our kids to play.

She is a nice person, 
but nothing ever seems to be going well for her. 

Most of the time she is stressing over things that haven't even happened yet.
Already decided that things won't work out because "they never do."

When something does go the way she hoped...
she glosses over it, barely talks about it anymore.
And she moves right on to something else to complain about.

Her name isn't Nelly - but I think it should be.
Negative Nelly... that is all I can think about when I run into her.

And I do, I run into her a lot.
On accident all the time...
park, grocery, library.

We have made plans to hang out, but it rarely works out.
Something always happens to Nelly and she can't make it.

She even says that when we make plans...
"Okay, Monday at 10... as long as little Johnny* doesn't keep me up all night screaming."
Or something along those lines.

She has rubbed off on me in the few times we have time to talk.
I end up complaining too.

At first because I feel bad saying, "Life is great - I am happy all the time."
So I join in on the spoil-sport mentality.

Being negative is a slippery slope...
and before you know it I am in Poor-little-old-me Ville and stuck there.

 I leave feeling crappy...

By thinking and then saying negative things.
Complaining and dwelling on the little things that bug me...
I end up in a horrible mood.

This mood doesn't just stop at my edges.
Nope, it rolls right over on to Miss Eva.
She gets cranky, throws a tantrum and doesn't nap well.

Our minds are powerful.
I read something somewhere...

Think it, say it, be it.

I the reality is not as bad as Nelly thinks...
and that next time I see her I am going to cheer her on 
instead of complaining with her.

Don't be a negative Nelly...
and don't join in with her either.



And Communal Global

16 comments:

Kelly said...

I can totally be a Nelly. It's time to kick her to the curb. Ha!
Great post.

Val said...

Love this post Nessa. Before I was married and had kids I traveled lots. Mostly the third world. I say all the time to my son; we have won the lottery of life, stop complaining.

Cari said...

Well, at first I thought you were talking about the rapper, so, okay...

Right on!!! I have had to sadly cut out some of the Negative Nellies in my life, becaues it does rub off, then it spreads and grows.

Laughter, and smiles, and positivity do the same; but it's a lot more work. And it seems that some people are just resistant to it. Makes me sad for them. I hope Nelly is responsive to you cheering her on!

Mandi said...

I know what you mean and I commend you for deciding to cheer her on! Because honestly, if someone is too negative and complaining I move on. As you said it rubs off too easily and I don't want to find myself in that negative state of mind.

rachel said...

good for you, Nessa!

Jessica said...

Complaining can come so easily, but never ends well. We need to choose to be grateful for all that God's given us! I hope your able to help your friend out in this area!

Jennifer @ Studio JRU said...

Love it! It is so hard to be around the negative nelly's... always brings you down. It's contagious. :) I try not to join in!

Melanie said...

You now Nessa, the more & more I read this it made me think that you two were meant to cross paths,(maybe that's why you run into all the time)not so she can bring you down ~or turn you into a Nelly~ But so you can build her up. Not that's your job or anything, but I think you just being you could really help her, & her family. That's how awesome I think you are mama!

misc.alaina said...

Love your perspective on this! Great post!!

Laura said...

My favorite line....her name isn't Nelly, but it should be. Made me laugh.

You know what, I have a friend like this. The more you speak positivity into her life and yours around her, the more life you bring into your friendship. Soon you'll see the change in her. I have a feeling you run into her all of the time for a reason. That you were put in her life for a reason. And I think you already know what that is! :)

Anniki said...

Everyone else already told so nice comments, I just want to add that the photo is really cute!

Adrienne said...

Great reminder. Don't ever want to be Nelly...don't want to enable her either... When I'm around negativity I tend to shut down (I think life time with mom had something to do with this)...really want to speak positively and keep giving encouraging energy when I find myself with the Nellies.

Heather from wearetheholdens.blogspot.com said...

So awesome that you get to pour positivity into her and fill her tank up. Love your decision to not be a negative Nelly...go in to it..ready. :)

Jami said...

you are one smart lady! I've known some negative nellie's, and I've probably been one too ;) Shine a light for her friend! xoxo

Carol said...

I love your clarity Nessa! You are so right on with this. I have one in my life too...sometimes I can barely pick up the phone because I don't want to hear it...amazing how negativity can poison a perfectly good day.

Lori said...

Im right there with ya! I have a few nellys in my life right now that I try to avoid. They throw up on me, walk away feeling relieved to have gotten things off their chest, then my day is shot. Attitudes rub off on me very easily. Thanks for the reminder to always try to lift others up.