little big Eva

You seem so grown-up lately.

Using big words in even bigger sentences and having conversations with a purpose.

You started being a little mama to Mr. Theodore, ordering him around and holding his hand...

even when he would rather do it himself.

Disappearing to the bedroom to read your books.

You like alone time to get lost in your stories...

 daydreaming about princesses and horses, fairies and magic spells.

Some days I stare and stare...

 wondering where the little lady in my presence came from.

It is like all the babyness just fell off and left this long and willowy girl behind.

All elbows, knees, and big eyes that seem to know more than they should.

It was rough holding things together while your brother was sick.

Days without your mom, dad and little brother...

I know it made you sad, but you never really mentioned it.

Just that you didn't want Theodore to ever be sick again...

and the next time you stay with Goggy and Poppy, you want us all to stay, together, as a family.

SO brave and big.

Then you have a bad day.

A day where listening is hard and the tears come easily.

We battle and you fight harder.

Standing your line and pushing against mine with all your might.

Time-outs turn into time-ins.

Time-in: a big hug, on my lap folded up in a ball.

It usually starts a little forced, but you quickly sink in and lay your head on my shoulder.

I tickle your back and we rock in the rocking chair until the tears go away.

And I get my baby back...

even if her legs trail down past my knees and her arms can circle my waist.

My little big Eva.