thoughts on having enough

All the leaves have fallen and there is snow on the ground.
Thanksgiving is only a few days away. 
And there are Christmas trees being stacked up in the parking lot.

I started my gift list yesterday.
It is hard to make a list of gift ideas for everyone we love.  

Finding them something they will like.
Well, not just like, really love.
The gift that they will wonder how they ever got by without it before.

That perfect gift, on super sale
 and found at the little store around the corner or with free overnight delivery.

I know I have big dreams and grand illusions for my gift giving.

While out there hunting - I am getting bombarded.
Shopping for others is making my want list grow and grow.

I really don't want to want anything.
Does anybody really?

Coupons and deals are trying to trick me into buying more...
can't let that super cash go to waste.
Genius custom ads are popping up...
 and I am clicking over - making them smarter.
E-mails giving me the heads-up on the greatest sale on boots...
but I don't need that sale or the boots.
Pretty blogs with huge lists of links to the cutest things...
that I didn't know I needed (or existed) until they told me..

So I am making an effort.

Getting rid of all those sale emails
Unsubscribing from the deals.
Skipping blogs that have all the must-have lists and links
Deleting the apps for all the deals-of-the-day.

Shopping with intention for only those people on my list.
Focusing on the people I want to make happy.
Finding a gift that shows my love... perfect or not.

Doing my best to ignore the voice that is saying I might miss out on something...
and all of the voices in the world telling me that I most definitely am.

 the newest must-have
 the greatest outfit in stores
the most amazing deal in history
the largest sale ever
the lowest price on record
best and brightest thingamabob that will certainly change my life for the better.

It is all a trick.
Get it on sale now or pay more later.
That things make us happy, and more of them make us even happier.
That we aren't good enough.

It is exhausting.
And both my children rarely ever sleep through the night.

Because I am really, truly not missing out on anything...
except for maybe the all the really good things that can't be put on sale.

I have more than I need.
 And as Goodwill donations center will tell you...
 even more than I want.

And it is really about time that I stop letting other people tell me different.